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In this lesson, I will teach you verbs, expressions, and idioms you can use to bring out your unique personality and communication style. For example, there is a lot more you can say other than "I think that..." Using other expressions such as "it looks as if", "it sounds like", "I sense that", or "I feel that" makes your language richer and helps you build relationships with others. Watch this video to discover more about your own personal style and how you can express yourself more like a native speaker. This video goes into the theory of NLP (neuro-linguistic programming). If you want to go even further with the idea of representational systems within NLP, you can then use your knowledge of language and behaviour to build stronger relationships and to influence people. For example, if you observe that your friend is a strongly visual person, you can adapt your language and the expressions you use to be more visual. This will help the two of you connect and interact better.

TRANSCRIPT

Hi, everyone. I'm Jade. What we're talking about today is language of the senses, and I made this lesson because I noticed that when you're using your language prospects and things about... Things like that, to give... To express an opinion, it's always taught, like, you say: "I think", "I think this because", or "I think that because". When I realized that, in reality, we use... Our language is much broader, and we use a lot of different phrases to express an opinion, basically; and I also realized that a lot of the language we use is based on our senses. So, I'm going to share those phrases with you today, and that will make your language and... When you're speaking English, it will make your language much more rich and more expressive, basically.

 

And it also relates to NLP, which is a way of thinking about the communication between us. What is successful communication? How can we be more successful as communicators? And I don't want to go too much into it, except I'm going to look at the ideas... The idea of communication styles. And according to NLP, each of us has a preferred communication style, and it's based on our strongest sense, you could say, and that means the way we interpret the world.

 

So, everybody has a way of interpreting the world, and we do that through our senses. So, if you are somebody who's a strongly visual person, and that's your strongest sense, your language will use lots of language that's visual, and we'll look at that. We'll give... I'll give you some examples in a minute.

 

You might be an auditory person, this means that your strongest sense is your... What... What comes to your ears, in which case, your language will be using terms that evoke a sense of hearing and what you hear. You may also be a kinesthetic person. This means that you interpret the world through your sense of touch and your feelings. I am a kinesthetic person. If you listen to me speaking normally in my life with my friends and everything, my language is always: "I feel", "I feel that because", where, really, I mean the same as: "I think", but the term I use to express what I mean is "I feel". So maybe you're like me, or you might be an auditory digital person. This is the kind of person... I didn't know what symbol to write, here. This is a kind of person who interprets the world in a logical way, according to systems and things like that, so I put a little mathematical symbol there. I didn't know what else to put.

 

So, what we'll do now is we'll look at some different phrases people may use to give an opinion. So, remember we can use all these phrases as an alternative just to: "I think", which is not very imaginative language, not very expressive either.

 

So, what if you say: "It looks as if..." We can use this phrase to give an indirect opinion. So, let's imagine a situation. I'm going to use the same situation for all these. Our friend, Tom, he was going to have a party, he's invited a few people, but he hasn't really planned anything, and it's got close to the time of the party and now he's having second thoughts because he hasn't organi-... He hasn't organized anything, and maybe this party's not going to happen. So, I can say: "It looks as if Tom's going to cancel his party." And I can say that, rather than: "I think Tom's going to cancel his party." It's an indirect way of giving an opinion.

 

The same situation: "It sounds like Tom's going to cancel his party." Now, I notice, when I'm... When I'm just speaking naturally in lessons to people, sometimes... Or even friends, people I meet. Sometimes they get really confused by "sounds like". If you haven't encountered it before, you might not realize it means the same as "think" or maybe more like "seem", "It seems like".

 

So, a person who uses this in their speech is likely to be someone who interprets the world through their hearing sense, a person who is an auditory... A person who has auditory communication style. The next one, here: "To tell you the truth..." Using the same situation: "To tell you the truth, I think Tom's going to cancel his party because he hasn't done any preparation." That's just a phrase that we use before we... We make a statement about what's true, apparently.

 

And when we use language like "tell" or "say", again, this one relates to the auditory communication style. I mentioned this a little bit earlier, someone who always talks in: "I feel" or "I'm feeling", they're a kinesthetic person, and we can use this in place of "I think". Also, somebody who uses: "I sense...", "I get the sense that Tom's going to cancel his party because he hasn't done any preparation." In that example I just said for you there, I said: "I get a sense", we can also say that. "I think..." I don't need to say anything about that. And we could also say: "I know..." Certainty.

 

So, some people will say this: "I know Tom's going to cancel his party because he hasn't done anything." Even if you don't actually % know, some people will use that kind of language, and that can indicate that they are an auditory digital style of communicator. Is this useful for anything? Well, according to NLP, if you are communicating with someone, if you're talking to someone, and you can identify their communication style because they're using lots of language that is visual or one of the others - if you match your own language to theirs, you will get on better, you will have better rapport, you will have a flowing conversation, basically, because in that moment you're interpreting the world from the same... From the same point of view and the same sense.

 

When we're having conversations with people, we can also build "rapport", which is a word for connection and friendliness, by replying to the person we're speaking to, saying these kind of phrases. So, a similar... A similar exa-... A phrase of... I'm not talking properly, here. You could say something like: "I understand."-okay?-in reply to one of these things. "It looks as if Tom's going to cancel the party because he hasn't done any preparation." "I understand." You could say that. Or you could say one of these, and these, again, relate to the different communication styles. You could say: "I hear you." It means: "I understand."

 

Of course, literally, you hear what the person has told you, but other than that, it gives us a sense of what's important for that person. You might also say: "I'm listening." That means: "Tell me more." You could say: "I see your point." Again, it means: "I understand." You could say: "I can imagine." Someone who is able to imagine the situation, that again, is visual. You're seeing a picture in your mind's eye. Or you might say: "That makes sense", based on what you already know about the situation, and that would make you an auditory digital kind of person. When we come back, I'm going to teach you some idioms and expressions that also relate to the four different communication styles. Let's have a look at some idioms and expressions to do with the different senses.

 

So, first of all, we have the ones to do with touch, feeling, or we could say kinesthetic idioms. "Someone who can think on their feet." This is someone who's, like, really quick thinking. If you're looking to employ someone, often they're looking for someone who can think on their feet. If it's a job where you never know what's going to happen that day, you want someone who can respond quickly to different problems. What about when: "Actions speak louder than words", what does that mean? That means that, to you, what... What somebody does is more important than what they say.

 

So, this is the idea that somebody can be saying all the right things, but yet, their behaviour doesn't match all the good words that they're saying. So, to a feeling-orientated person, what you do is a lot more important than what you say. What does it mean "To bite your tongue"? Often these verbs of the senses, they create really visual images. "To bite your tongue", physically means that you're not able to speak, but what it means is not say something when you really want to. When you really want to say something, but there are times that you just need to bite your tongue because it would be inappropriate for you to say something, or maybe... Maybe it would cause trouble. So, in those situations, you need to bite your tongue. And lastly for this section: "To get to grips with something". "Grip" is... "To grip" something is a verb. We do with your... You do with your hand. It means to hold something quite tightly, like, now I'm gripping the pen quite tightly.

 

So, "to get to grips with something" means to get to the point where you fully understand it. Moving on, now, let's look at some expressions to do with the auditory hearing sense. When a place is really, really, really quiet, we say: "You could hear a pin drop there." Just imagine the sound of a pin falling. "Ding." I don't know what it would sound like, maybe like that. Moving on: "To have a word with someone". We use this expression to mean when we want to talk to someone in private. Not necessarily private, actually. "I need to speak to Jane and have a word with her." Sometimes it can mean that someone's going to get in trouble when you have a word with someone, but not all the time. And, what does it mean to "talk something over" with someone? This means to discuss a problem. "I set up a meeting so that we can talk over the plans for next year." Moving on, let's have a look at some phrases to do the auditory digital communication style. These people are very logical people who interpret the world in things being very clear and fitting certain rules.

 

So, to this kind of commun-... Communicator, you might hear them say something like: "Trying to make sense of something". When you want to make sense of something, you want to understand it fully. You try to make sense of it. To this kind of communicator as well, it's also important to use your common sense. What does "common sense" mean? Well, "common sense" can mean what's really obvious. So, sometimes people are really, really intelligent, they know a lot, but they don't have any common sense. When you don't have any common sense, you don't... Maybe don't know how to do really simple, practical tasks that most people know how to do. And let's have a look at what's left in the visual section.

 

When you "Don't see eye to eye with someone", this is someone that you just can't really help but disagree with them. You're always having one opinion, they're always having a different opinion, and you never meet in the middle. You don't see eye to eye with someone. And this is quite a good one to understand the general idea of communication style as well, because someone who's interpreting the world in a really visual way all the time, with that sense being really, really strong may not have such good rapport and make such easy conversation with someone who's auditory digital, for example, someone who's very logical, precise, clear. Anyway, just something to think about, there. So, what you can do now is go to the engVid website,(www.engvid.com) do a quiz on today's lesson. And what you can also do before you go is subscribe here to my channel. I also have a different channel, because I've got two YouTube channels. Really appreciate it if you subscribe in both places. And I'm going to go now. See you.