My Mom Arranged My Marriage With A Guy I Didn't Date
Hi! I’m Kathy. I've always been afraid of one thing – disappointing my parents. And recently, to avoid doing this, I paid someone to pretend that he was my boyfriend. But this led to even a bigger catastrophe than the one I was trying to escape from.
I bet you can imagine a pretty conservative family, where the husband is a lawyer, married to a perfect housewife, who raises perfect children that study well and always say “Yes, ma’am” and “No, ma’am.” This is totally true for my family. My parents have always been strict on me, to the point that I never wore makeup to school and the hemline of my skirt was never above my knee.
It's no wonder that I have never dated a guy. Although, once my classmate Jackson invited me to a school dance, and my parents insisted on him coming over and having a talk with them first. You see, my dad wanted to make sure that Jackson didn't have any bad intentions with me. Anyway, I’m not sure what my dad actually told Jackson back then, but this made him change his mind about taking me anywhere. I cried the whole night and mom just kept saying that this meant that he was the wrong guy for me.
Oh, my mom’s attitude toward boys deserves special attention here. She insisted that there was no point in dating, at least until I graduated from school, so that nothing would distract me from studying and so that later on I could easily get into college. She believed that there, in college, I would meet the perfect guy, from a decent family, who would want to become my husband and would appreciate my perfect reputation of being a good girl.
So, yes, this was one of the reasons why I couldn't wait for the moment when I would leave for college. I wanted a relationship, and I wanted to hang-out and party and other fun stuff, and I was always afraid to tell that to my parents. You see, they always kept saying how much they had done and how hard they had worked so that I wouldn’t ever feel like I needed anything and stuff like that, and this must have wracked me with guilt. That’s why I thought I might have been a bad person if I ever asked for anything more.
Anyway, last year I successfully graduated from school as an ‘A’ student, I received a letter from Princeton, packed my belongings, and left for college. Just try to imagine my excitement and anticipation about that. Literally, during my first week there, my dorm neighbor Claire took me to my first party ever. I just was so lucky that she appeared to be an amazing cool girl. And as soon as she heard about my “dramatic” life with my parents, as she called it, she began helping me upgrade my social skills.
And this party thing actually turned out to be amazing! There was a guy, who I noticed as soon as I entered the place. He came up, said that his name was Austin and fifteen minutes later, I already understood that he was the one. Of course, I was so happy and pleased with myself, that the next morning, when my mom called to find out how I was doing, I could not resist telling her everything, ‘cause after that party Austin asked me to become his girlfriend.You have to understand that Austin was one of those guys people say is the full-package. He was in his third year studying law and he came from a good family, which was sort of wealthy. Apparently he didn’t tell me this when we first met, but I assumed so, judging by his expensive watches. Anyway, mom said he was a catch, and I really liked him and I felt that he was absolutely into me and everything. I was the happiest girl on the planet.
And I was definitely afraid to lose him. So, when, at some point, he gave me a hint that our relationship should, you know, develop further to the next stage, I thought it wouldn’t be a big deal and… well, we spent the night together. Well, yes, mom warned me about those college guys and that they could be pretty persistent, but Austin was a really decent guy, and we talked a lot about family values and children and so on, to the point that I was super-sure that someday we were going to get married and he was going to become my first and only man anyway.
We had been dating for about four months when we got into our first argument. He was pretty irritated by the fact that my mom was, meddlesome, so to speak. Let me explain. Since my parents knew about our relationship already, and since Austin turned out to be so charming that I totally fell for him, mom really strived to get to know every single detail of us being together to prevent me from screwing everything up.
So, she gave me lots of advice, and we discussed a lot of things together, even wedding stuff...
LearnAndRecord
2015年2月8日
2019年10月28日
第1724天
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